今日仕事の場所

    

It's a good day working today....went to new places with nice colleagues

Able to go and see more places with nice sceneries too....

Although still having some troubled thoughts....perhaps all of it will slowly get better

Recently

    

Things have gotten a turn for the better....thankfully

Feels kinda like some of my prayers have been answered....

My health is in good condition and there's no other complications

Really grateful for this outcome

Also, I've just started working after almost 2 months of inactivity

Need to wake up really early and go far away to work, but it's for the better

Now I could really sleep soundly after returning home from a tiring day

The best thing so far is that the jobscope, colleagues and pay is actually good

Feels pretty good roving around different areas again, seeing and checking things outside

Looking forward to getting my pay soon and settle lots of stuffs on my checklist

はゃとちり x 花束を君に

Spent some time editing and getting the audio to fit into the video

But sadly....I couldn't post this up anywhere due to copyright issues....

I really like this.

So I'll instead post it here at my little corner

Hoping someone would enjoy and liked this 🎶🎞️ as well

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(....maybe I could be a good editor or something?)

Recently 🐻 went live 👏

Hear her talking about her kid....think many of my idol now has kids....😞 haha

Cuz I cut my hair before the lock, so it's still not that bad

Nothing new, still around

Needs to find a job soon to work though....

2020

Digimon Frontier - An Endless Tale

OLIVIA

Olivia inspi' Reira (Trapnest) - WISH

Definitely my Song & MV of the year

🔥🔥🔥


Olivia Lufkin is definitely my best discovery for this year

And its through watching an old anime called ''NANA''

Who would have thought watching that anime would led me to discover

One of my most favourite singer of all time....

Just wanted to say

I really love your music Olivia.....and you're really beautiful 😌

Glad you have a blessed and happy marriage life~

Really happy you're still around, and I could still follow you

This year 2019 has been hard for me....

Mostly sadness surrounds me, but your music soothes my soul

I like your musical world....it's so wonderful

From the awesome rock song to love song....I really love them all

Your songs & music will accompany me till the day I die.

I.L.Y. Olivia ♥

Silent Hill 3 - I Want Love (Studio Mix)

Been starting to see some old friends of my age registering for marriage....

Would also be attending one later this year....

Feels kinda scary to be honest....

How others have moved on forward so much and I'm still kinda struggling in life....

Sudden thoughts that I might not even be able to reach to that part of life....

how much preparation needed to even reach there....

All these thoughts are kinda heavy but also kinda motivating me to work harder.....

It then seems like....that's actually one of the spiritual?....goal of our life?

Finding a partner....going through with the ceremony together....and receiving blessings then....

Maintaining contacts with friends and people that you get to meet in your life is also quite

a challenge.....it's not easy....especially when there's so many people one would get to meet....

I'm improving myself....

Don't know why but sometimes I would avoid bumping into someone I know....it's weird

(Something inside of me just don't feel comfortable?....)

Then again....I could open up and switch on the socialising button....and there would be no problem

talking with almost anyone....

But I guess most of the time, my button's off....

Perhaps because there's sadness in my heart....which makes me feels off most of the time....

I don't know

Would be great if people could have this understanding without me telling them....(hah)

So they won't find me weird or anything of that sort....(laugh)

I think it's also the small accidental things I've done, that sort of caused me having some of these

weird emotions as well....

Such as accidentally unfollowed and then decided to clear some people on instagram & etc....(laugh)

Maybe these kind of stuffs....plus as I'm kinda sensitive to the feelings of others, or sometimes,

I might just be thinking too much....?

Anyway, feels better after saying what I've wanted to say here....getting stuffs off my chest

Night.

Recently I've bought a mic to sort of improve my content of my game recording...

Still getting used to talking and sounding 'nice' for my recording

But I'm definitely starting to get more comfortable with it as time passes

Went for my IPPT today at Sportshub at around 5pm today

Luckily I managed to pass it with 71 points on my first attempt this year

Didn't really have much time or energy to prepare for this year's IPPT

But surprisingly I've performed better this time round compared to last year I would say

I've ran first place with a 12min+ timing which I considered as a great improvement

as compared to my past of around 13~14min++

So yeah, think I've finally nailed the breathing pattern for me when I run

And also the small trick of using the vicks inhaler for clearing stuffy nose thing....

It really works wonder I would say

So recently this year I've also enrolled in the haircutting Nitec course

Don't think I've mentioned it here yet but yeah

So far I feel it's kinda tiring and stuffs....(as usual)

I'll try to uphold my value of not giving up of course

Hopefully I could go through with this course successfully....

I'll just tell myself to learn the most out of it and try to do it step by step

in how I'm told to do and not think too much and dread about it....

Good thing is the whole school fee is free and I do not need to fork out a single cent

except with the use of my PSEA account which is great

But I think I would still need to spend money on some of the equipments I would need

to use privately on my own or at work next time such as the scissors for cutting real person

and hairdryer and etc...

Olivia Lufkin - Into The Stars

🖤.........

Feeling & Emotion

There's some things I would like to express....

Sadly, there isn't anyone who could lend me their ears....

That's why I'm writing here...

Feelings are something that affects me a lot

And I've came to realized that not every feelings should be followed through

Even if they are your true, honest & real feeling....for someone

I hope that unblessed feeling would be no more whenever I see that person from now on

Because it's clear to me where the heart lies....

It's kinda absurd....why sad and complicated relationship issues always happen to me....

No love, no companionship....perhaps the time is not yet right for me....

But well, I've tried follow through my feelings, and there is no regret.

Think it's what I needed to do and go through to understand and grow as a person.

(Though I think deep inside, we all wished that our true feelings would be reciprocated...)

Maybe it's kinda amazing to look at it this way and see how things are being planned out..?

It would be great now if our relationship don't turn into a bitter one.

Though I hope not to get close anymore.

As it will only bring painful emotions....especially for me

Got to let go of the unwanted feelings now.

Every year seems to have some things in stall for me.....

This year is no exception and I know next year will be too

Looking forward to a better future~

桜雨

Under a cherry blossom rain,

together,

we had a vain and fragile dream.

Why are you the only one

that my capricious heart

can't let go?

The love of two people

represents the evening.



Under a cherry tree

I leave there my floating heart

and walk away.

That dreamlike story

has turned out to be a joke.



Everything that happens in front of us

looks like a true miracle.

We even seem to forget to blink and to breath.

Under a cherry blossom rain,

together...

A precious scene that demands just a moment.

Even if with the dawn it seems I come out from a dream,

I'd love you even more.



The days I cannot meet you

are clear, or they are cloudy;

why the world always looked different 'till now?



I laugh, as always, but

probably I look lonely.

I made you do that face,

and I hate myself.



Under a cherry blossom rain,

together,

we had a vain and fragile dream.



A guilty and repeated lie:

sharing countless last kisses,

maybe we'll be able to end this.



It will give you new feelings,

this love will look like your first.

Who do you love, now?

Even if you struggle,

you'll be pervaded,

because this is an essential poison.

Enough, untie yourself!

Free yourself now!

Go away, far away!

Become the past.



Remove the scars from your accumulated wounds,

even if they'll come back again and again;

their feeling and the pain

are not remotely important,

because even if you're stained,

I'll still love you.



Under a cherry blossom rain,

together,

we had a vain and fragile dream.

Why are you the only one

that my capricious heart

can't let go?

The love of two people

represents the evening.



"Even if we're not destined,

staying connected,

will we ever be able to change?"


_____________________________________


This MV is really well made, and kinda catches my attention.....

It's like something I would like to have now but couldn't....

Anyway, one thing I appreciate a lot from japanese music is that

even if it's in visual-kei or rock genre, their lyrics can still be so deep and meaningful.

DISTRESS AND COMA

滿座 Full House