Monday, 16 May 2011

Waseda Shibuya Senior High School

Toilet

Classroom Corridor

Staircase

Basketball Court

Swimming Pool & Girl Dorm

Boys & Girls Dorm

Fountain outside the dorm

School Canteen






今天去了日本学校。。。我好想去那里读好久了。。。但我不是日本人,连半个都不是。。。
但是,我还是去问了,问我能不能读。
结果还是不行。。。
我好喜欢那里的课室哦,还在用黑板。。。
我好喜欢那里的篮球场,游泳池,宿舍,食堂。。。如果能跟妹妹一起在那里读书,我对自己人生就很满足了。。。但我知道是不可能的。
看见我周围都是日本人。。。心情不知不觉的就觉得很开心。


I went to Waseda Shibuya Senior High School today, I am so disappointed that I can't study there...why Am I not a Japanese! Even half will do!
Nevertheless, I still went and ask for admission.
I really love the classroom, which they are still using blackboard...
I really love thier Japanese style basketball court, swimming pool, dorms, canteen...I think everything~
Seeing that my surrounding is filled with Japanese people, I feel very happy...

Sunday, 15 May 2011

此外,
呵呵,这周的星座占卜,妹妹的粘人性格好可爱~

P.S. : 我买了Alice Nine的 ''Alpha''~ ^_^
我为什么。。。好对不起。。
啊啊啊啊啊啊!! 我好有罪恶感!!!。。。
妹妹。。
我看到一首歌。。。好。。 > /////// <
但我觉得这样也。。。很好。。。啊~ ~!。。。所以我觉得自己真的很坏吧。。。
至于那首歌。。我说不出口。。。但又好想放上来。。。还是不要比较好吧。。

Why... a butterfly...

Saturday, 14 May 2011

啊啊啊啊啊,写给妹妹的文章不见了!?!?!?!
投诉!!

Thursday, 12 May 2011

好乱。。。我不知道会不会因为妹妹,我不想读书呢。。。不知道啦。

但是,我很希望自己能不放开你的手。。。也不会影响到真实的我。。。能吗?(会吗?)
坚持到最后,真的就会看到。。。只有坚持到最后的人才看得到的,那样闪闪发亮的东西吗?
我。。。选择了。。。。去相信你。。。
希望有一天,那个美好的日子会来临。。
继续牵着你手, 我不能放手!!! 我。。。千万不要放手啊。。。
如果。。。我们能真正的抱住彼此不就很好。。。为什么不能。。
但是,我希望那天的到来。。。希望我能支撑到那一天的到来。。。
~
到妹妹那里。


在此,我也希望妹妹能开开心心,健健康康的度过每一天。

Wednesday, 11 May 2011

Listening to Red and doing massive Headbanging ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Till my head flies out ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
Feeling fucked up and blank...

Versailles - MASQUERADE

Did I do something wrong in the past?
Something that leads me to how I'm feeling now...
I should already forget the feelings for you...or am I concealing it?
I hate to say this but, I don't know.
Why do I want to re-ignite sad things again?...or is it sadness is all the thing I have now...

Synchronicity~第二章 光と影の楽園~ 中文字幕

【鏡音レン】君を捜す空【オリジナル】中文字幕


妹妹又帮我加了新篇章~ * * *

Tuesday, 10 May 2011

Monday, 9 May 2011

又是新一期的杂志,我每次都会看它的星座的那面。
以前,我都会一直看我喜欢的那位女孩的星座跟我的
每次看到我们有相同的幸运颜色,我都会很开心,看到我们的星座会很搭配,更开心~
但是,我们连朋友都不是。。。
过了好久没去打听她的消息了。。。昨天我便情不自禁地去看了你的部落格。。
看来你还是过得挺好的, 而且也有喜欢的人了吧。。
但我还是觉得,如果我们没有误会,一定能相处得很好很好。。。一定。
所以,我也不想有女朋友了,因为这个初恋情人,我以前说过,除了她,不会再跟其她女生结婚了。
还抱着误会的你,看到我这样写,会觉得我神经病吧?你心里想 :'' 我跟他连话都没讲过,他为什么会喜欢我,变态!''。可能你忘了。。。但我们有说过话呀,虽然我们的话,加起来才十个字左右。我还记得你那时问我有没有你手机款的耳机,我说没有。。。当初,我只要想到跟你说过话,就超开心了。。。但你不懂。
 虽然你很容易忘记怨恨。。。但是。。。不要紧。


。 。 。  。 。 。


好,但是!我现在便改看妹妹的星座了,哈哈。
这期说妹妹的家庭运是 :'' 对方的体贴,将让你忘记很多的伤痛''
妹妹有伤痛就告诉哥哥哦。
希望我能让妹妹开心吧~ ^_^


P.S. : 妹妹的幸运颜色是金色, 幸运号码是3哦

Thursday, 5 May 2011

Suddenly, thinking back the days when I started playing Habbo Hotels on computer with my cousin...the days are really beautiful and colourful...
And even now as I'm writing, I think back about my Primary School days...those are like...something more than nostalgic. It is like the bright beginning chapter of my life...its really quite amazing that I have walked down these paths in the past and come to now...
It has really become a very beautiful memories to me, I will cherish everything...do stay in my heart forever.

Studio 27 Jamming Room, My Hideout




沙发好舒服。

Castlevania: Aria of Sorrow - Chapel

Castlevania : Aria of Sorrow


Although I played this game quite some years back, I still really like this game.
I will borrow it from my cousin again to embrace in its beautiful world.
I recommend those who have GBA to buy this game and play! You will like it if you are a special person like me ^_^

Wednesday, 4 May 2011



Gone to cut my hair today, well I'm quite happy because I like my back hair so much~

Tuesday, 3 May 2011








Its so frustrating...my parents don't care about how I really feel...just keep pushing me to study and study.
Fuck, I should have just don't tell them that I skip school.
I really hate many things that will happen to me, can I just sit in a time machine with my current body and goes back to the far past?

P.S. : so happy to see hikki's song in HMV...its her WILD LIFE !~

Monday, 2 May 2011

你在哪里。。。(泪)

昨晚我做了一个梦。
那个梦,我看见了妹妹。。。这是第一次。
我今早很害怕。。。会不会是妹妹托梦给哥。。。

我梦见了妹妹在医院 T_T 。。。躺着。。然后哥哥很着急的跑来看妹妹。
当我看到妹妹时,我感到十分喜悦。。但妹妹是在医院。。。
妹妹看到哥哥时也很开心。。。然后有一些模糊。。
但,我把自己的头放在妹妹的手上。。。感受到妹妹的温暖。
我便去妹妹的床躺。。。让妹妹在后面抱住哥哥 ^/// ^
妹妹感觉有点烧烧的。。。妹妹发烧吗?。。=(

接下来,妹妹问哥哥一个问题,你说,如果妹妹以后会变成这样(不想说),哥哥还会要妹妹吗?
哥哥很心痛。。。但哥哥很清楚自己的答案,我马上回答,哥哥会一直陪着妹妹,不管妹妹变成怎么样。

妹妹,哥哥。。。哥哥已经不想离开你了。。。
妹妹不在。。。哥哥很难过。。。我不敢想象没有妹妹的日子  T A T
我还真的打去了!xP 心脏跳得好快。。。妹妹我太担心。。。所以打了给你,但你关机。。
糟糕,我还留了很笨的流言吧。。。X—X
会不会是我多心了呢。。。
哥哥希望明天一早能看到妹妹。。。好。。妹妹晚安。
突然之间,我有一个疯狂的想法。。。
其实,不管读什么,对现在的我来说,如果能跟妹妹一起,我就很开心了。做什么也都会认真。
所以。。。我想去台湾读书!而且要能看到妹妹的学校!
不知道能不能这样说但。。。我不管!我要去找妹妹了!!!

妹妹,哥哥回家。。到满晚时看到你没上网,突然之间就害怕了起来。。
我。。如果妹妹出事。。。我看我也不要去读书了。。
妹妹。。。哥哥一直都很担心妹妹。。。怕妹妹万一出事,哥哥不能在场保护你。。。我会很生气。。。自己什么都帮不上。。

无论如何,妹妹不管发生了什么,妹妹一定要告诉哥哥!不管发生什么,哥哥都答应不离开你了!好吗?

Sunday, 1 May 2011

FINAL FANTASY XIII 挿入歌「Eternal Love」 -special live edit- / 菅原紗由理

I've wasted so much time again!
Thinking of going to school again...I feel so depressed
反正现在没有目标除了组日本团。。。我就去那时那间找我的模特儿公司吧。。。这次我就偷偷的去了。

Since I have no goals now, except for forming Japanese Rock Band, I will go to the model company that finds me few months back...secretly

Marina Bay









在拍这些照时,哥哥都一直想着,我好想让妹妹看到。。。跟哥哥一起看。
我希望有一天,我们能一起玩。
今天跟表哥还真是走了一整天呀 > <
当哥哥在家楼下收到妹妹简讯时也开心了起来。妹妹对哥哥真的很好。。谢谢你~(抱)

Thanks again to my cousin for making my mood better again, even though thinking of going school still sucks.
Anyway, I've learnt of another place to bring my sister if she comes, here!!

P.S. : More photos are uploaded at my Outing album on facebook.

Saturday, 30 April 2011

我没目标,不懂长到后要做什么工,好像根本都是不切实际的吧。
我想要很精彩的人生但现在刚好相反。
读书是浪费时间,因为我在读我长大不想做的工。
我很不想一直做着我不爱的工到老。
很多人都已知道长大想做什么了,而且都很实际的。
想到自己不切实际的梦想。。。就惨。。。根本不会实现吧。
我从某时开始这样我也忘了。。

看来,我要去逃避现实了。。等下去表哥家吧。。。至少能开心下才掉回来。。。好过一直不开心。
我很不喜欢时间流逝得这么快。。No Control。
不管现在想为未来做什么都做不了。。Refrain。

我会常羡慕别人,因为我好想跟他们一样,但我做不到。
现在我想走的路是哪一条?
不论说了多久,依然问回我自己。
我很讨厌脑里会一片空白。
人们读了这片文章,一定说我是个消极悲观的人。
妹妹会鼓励我,但一切都是短暂的。。
我知道妹妹会一直希望我们能一起开心,我知道。
妹妹也知道哥哥还是不开心。
哥哥是真的没办法。

我会这样写因该是因为我在别人面前说不出口吧。
至少我还有留下一些我活过的证明。(妹妹别担心)
现在是17岁。

啊啊啊啊啊啊啊啊,说这些没用的东西!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

~还在幻想中沉睡着的人~

P.S. : Sorry for those who read english only, I've chosen to write in chinese.

Thursday, 28 April 2011

Shou-Goh X CDJapan

Hello every loyal blog viewers of mine!
Great news to inform everyone!
I have been signed as an CDJapan's affiliate~ ^o^
So, I will provide useful link to the Top CDs ranking that people are demanding in Japanese music scene!
You will also be able to order CDs through the site!
Hope everyone supports CDJapan by going to their site!

Remember to check CD Japan Link Below my blog for Visual-Kei artists latest and upcoming releases!! Thanks people~!
Check out CDJapan's top Preorders here!
'' 我们慢慢来 ^_^ ''。。。听到这句话,我会感到很欣慰。。
妹妹已经是哥哥的了,哈哈哈 ^ o ^

Already seen the full video of Blue Flame, thanks to my sister > u <.
But, I still have to wait for a months plus for my order to arrive, fuuu  ~ 3 ~

Tuesday, 26 April 2011

[SPOT]Alice Nine「BLUE FLAME」



Alice Nine 's BLUE FLAME PV is out!
Both short and long version can be found here!


今天上了第一次的日本课。。。虽然也一样没有熟人,但我还是觉得很开心。。
而当我放课后,我走过一个演讲厅,便发现我的日本课外活动的人们在那边。
他们都很热情呢 ^_^
虽然不能读我喜欢的本科。。。(其实。。。我也不知道自己喜欢什么。。。只想的到组团吧。。。)但至少还有些能让我开心一点的东西啊。。

I have my first Japanese lesson today! Although there is no familliar people as usual but I'm really happy..
After my lessons, I went past the lecture theatre that I was finding for holding the Japan Tsubasa CCA!
I went up and told them when would the CCA for me commence and they approached me happily.
I think I will be able to make good friends in both of these Activity.
Although I can't study the main subject that I like...(but actually...I don't really know what I like...(can only think of forming rockband...) but at least there is something that would brightens up my mood...even if its a little..

Dolly - ムーンライトディスコ [Moonlight Disco]

Monday, 25 April 2011

My parent...especially my mother...don't even know anything or put in any effort to understand what I'm going through.
Is she really my mother? I'm thankful for her doing all the house chores, even though I did not express it out.
But, she keeps scolding and scolding, saying how she is doing all these in vain and how useless his son is.
What I need is the support for me to face my future...but my mother only know how to scold and keep rattle on how I'm so lazy and useless...
When I told her about how I may want to change my course if my current course is not doing well...(I'm already feel like changing immediately but I can't)...and she just scold me immediately!
She did not ask why or anything but she just scold me saying that I'm wasting my parent money...
I don't want to say anymore...to me now, I only have my sister...that is all I have.

昨晚睡觉时,我心里突然感到非常恐惧明天要上学。。不知不觉会喊出来,又想哭,但哭不出。

然后当我看我的电话时,发现有简讯。。
当我打开简讯看。。是我的妹妹发来的!...在这时候。。妹妹还特地发简讯给我。。。
我看到妹妹的简讯时是很兴奋的,但我心里还想着害怕的事。。所以没有好好的回复妹妹。
我真的很开心你能在我低潮时给我这种支持 ^_^
但妹妹也是害怕。。却还能鼓励我。。。妹妹,希望你也不要害怕,我们互相支持。

看到妹妹的第二个简讯时,我心里真的好多了!
我就一直看着妹妹的简讯便睡着了。。。
但我不断的在睡中醒来,而一醒来时,我的害怕又马上回来 Q_Q
然后,我又看着妹妹的简讯再回去睡。。。重复了几次。。

无论如何,我都要感谢妹妹这么的关心我!
我们就一起面对在前方的* 黑暗 。

MASQUERADE - Versailles

Sunday, 24 April 2011

Alice Nine Blue Flame CD - 3 Type

BLUE FLAME 2011.06.8 Release!

Standard Edition

01. BLUE FLAME
02. 残響ホワイトアウト / Zankyo Whiteout
03. G3


Limited Edition A

01. BLUE FLAME
02. 残響ホワイトアウト / Zankyo Whiteout
-
01. BLUE FLAME Music Clip
02. Music Clip Making


Limited Edition B

01. BLUE FLAME
02. 残響ホワイトアウト / Zankyo Whiteout
-
01. BLUE FLAME Music Clip (another edition)

Saturday, 23 April 2011

Versailles New Album : Holy Grail


New Look for Versailles 's upcoming album '' HOLY GRAIL''
Awesome?

Friday, 22 April 2011




小时候,我在玩悄悄板时被一个玩皮的同学伤到鼻子。
他很大力地摇,让我撞到鼻子流血。。。
我现在长大了,鼻子还不难看吧? 哈。

When I was small, while playing See-Saw, a naughty kid shake the See-Saw violently and my nose got hit hard by it and my nose bleed.
Now, I've grown up, my nose's shape is still not so bad right? haha.

Alice Nine New Look : Blue Flame


Always love Shou's new look.

安全感

现在想到要去新学校,心里一直还有着 '怕,怕,怕 '的感觉。
上学就很想快点放学。。

只有跟妹妹讲话,听妹妹的意见,才会让我感到安心。。
我要牵着妹妹的手走下去。
虽然我对我的未来还有所害怕,但我会带着妹妹的鼓励来面对。
我也希望我的鼓励能让妹妹觉得安心 ~ * U *

如果真的能跟妹妹上学,一起读就最好了。。
我只需要妹妹,一个了解我的人在我身边就够了。。这样会很贪心吗。。


我也不想妹妹老是听哥哥的诉苦。。。想让妹妹听开心的事。。
O ___ O
但我人生就是这样子。。。希望妹妹不会嫌弃。


P.S. : 我的学校没有我要的音乐团课外活动,糟糕,没团组了,美梦泡汤了 x-x
         My new school don't have any jrock band as CCA for me to join,
         my sweet dream is ruined x-x

Wednesday, 20 April 2011

最近要上学了, 每次回来家里都觉得很累。。。
就在早早, 我只想躺一下, 但一躺就差不多快3个小时!?
幸好不是马上到明天早上呢 ( : O

~就这样。。。日子过着~
Is studying the only way to go in Singapore?
I'm really worried life will just be like this for me...
After studying my polytechnic, hotel & leisure facilities management, go army and then work after coming out from army...
Well, I went to Resort World Singapore today, the hotels are all quite beautiful...thinking of taking photos but my  handphone 's battery is going low, so I can't take any.
Well, I still don't feel so happy going school, even though its a little better than first day.
I really hope I can play Japanese musics as a Jrock band , but I think my current school don't have any....so I join the Japanese cosplay, culture & manga CCA instead.

How I wish, I could have someone who will go through the same life with me...same school and course with me forever, can share my woe especially like this period...
But, I don't.
All I have now is my sister's support to go on everyday...

Monday, 18 April 2011

我好讨厌今天开学。。。我好像很难跟别人勾通。。。
今天跟我班的人突然走散,但我也不想跟他们一起啦。。。
就在厕所和少人的熟食中心两边徘徊。。。听着妹妹那两首镜音的歌。。。
还真不想回去学校呢。。。但明天又要去。。。到这么晚才能回家。。。
但妹妹。。。当我看到你的简讯时是超级开心的。。。真的很谢谢你。。。(抱)

Sunday, 17 April 2011

妹妹,我好紧张喔。。。明天要去新的环境。。。让我抱住你睡吧。。。明天考试加有哦!

The Everlasting Beauty





I love to walk alone at these places at this time...so peaceful....hah....
School starts officially tomorrow... Work Hard!!  ~ 3 ~
Thinking carefully now, I can only make friends with people on the surface, when it comes deeper, it is not possible at all.
This is the real answer to anybody...I only see things that is real in front of my eyes.
No more faking or bluffing myself.

Saturday, 16 April 2011

the GazettE Tokyo Dome 1


Wow the intro music...it sounds like Lucifer Call 's music !
Fuck, I have gone astray again...well who cares.
Anyway, I'm sick and tired of all these things that I will eventually gone through in life.
What going to NS, study, then work & die later...life is just so fucking boring!
I hate how this world is now...everything just sucks...just decompose already.
If end of the world is going to happen next year, I will not feel sad or anything, it is just a finally rest in peace for me.
I hate myself for not able to speak for myself...whenever this happens, I feel that I'm so useless sometimes.
Furthermore, such an extremely careless accident occurs today while I'm working...hope he has deleted all those images....ew.

Friday, 15 April 2011

The GazettE - VORTEX PV


Watch it before it is deleted people!!
My blog's top 3 country visitors :
1 - Singapore
2 - Taiwan
3 - United States

Thanks everyone from these countries!!
Other country's people, come often to be promoted!

P.S. : Thank you sister, for visiting often.



我的部落格,前三名来探望的国家 :
1 - 新加坡
2 - 台湾
3 - 美国


谢谢大家的支持,起它国家若要上榜就要更常来!

P.S. : 我知道妹妹是台湾代表,谢谢咯 ^o^

Thursday, 14 April 2011

昨天晚上睡觉时,我抱着皮卡丘一起睡。。。而我一直感受到妹妹还在哭,很心痛。。
妹妹。。。你不要离开我哦。。。我也不会离开你了。

Wednesday, 13 April 2011

我开门咯。。。进来,跟我一起吧。
不要伤心。。我很迟钝。。。到了不久我才发现我所说的那些话会让你这么伤心。。。我很想收回那些话。。
我不会让你独自承受那些悲伤的,我们一起承担。

我们就一起走下去吧~

Dolly - 時の列車



I wanted to put this song as my blog music now, but because its the GazettE theme, I don't think I should put it.
Anyway...like this song title, I want to take a time train and travel forever in the train back and forth in this world....never ending.
Anything is futile, the scar will be there forever.

the GazettE new look : VORTEX



the GazettE new look for their latest single ''VORTEX''.

Tuesday, 12 April 2011


My hair shape now is quite like a shorter version of this, but I like it a lot.
The problem is, I still don't know if my hair sides to the left or right...ugh....its been so long and I still don't know which side look the best for me.

Monday, 11 April 2011

I can and I will only fight on my own now, no one can really enter my world . . . no one..
I will become stronger.

Namie Amuro - Fight Together (English Lyrics)

Let’s head out before night becomes dawn
let’s go to face the unknown tomorrow
I’ve already decided to have no regrets
(Oh I know what I’m supposed to do)

my heart can’t help getting excited
over the kind of trials awaiting us
there’s only one place we’re aiming for
(Fly to the light)

our bond won at the end of the fight
we won’t let anyone get hurt
if you open your tightly clutched hands
you’ll find there is power dwelling inside

come on, time to go
the new world is calling us
hey, don’t you see
we’ll always be there for each other
no matter how many seas separate us
don’t be afraid of what’s ahead
because don’t forget
We fight together

we’ve never hurt each other
we’ve come a long way
from the days we looked up
at the high, spacious sky
with each oath in our hearts
we won’t lose ourselves
to the burdens we carry

the rising sun
even shines on our pain

I have faith
someday, let’s go find the future
that’ll bind us as one, together
you are irreplaceable to me
so don’t forget
We fight together

I will keep a lookout for similar clothing now  ^_^

Saturday, 9 April 2011



My current hair length, hope it can grow longer ^ A ^

Friday, 8 April 2011


I think this hair is good, hope to get my hair shape like this soon @_@

P.S. : Don't think I like Korea because I posted about Kim Jyong Hyun, I hate Korea musics

Thursday, 7 April 2011

JS Photo Time


Nice experience to walk along the streets like this with friends everyday...when night falls, my feelings will also          
be different...sometimes I will feel so in awe of natural changes that takes place everyday, feelings that are hard to put into words...

若能每次跟朋友一起在这街上走逛应该很不错。。。
当夜晚来临时,我的心情也会跟着有些变化。。。我有时候会因为这些自然的变化而感到敬畏。。。这种感觉是难以用话来形容的。。。

谢谢你

我第一次碰到想你这样的女孩,我头头说出那些话时,心里一直感到很矛盾,害怕会有不好的反应,但我也很想看你的反应。。。同时我也觉得自己很懦弱。明明很不想你走,却还硬想把你推开。。。
在工作时,我也一直很在意你的回复会是什么。。
当我回来看到时。。。我的心里真的很感动。。。
我一直不信任任何人,尤其是网上的,通常只是聊聊罢了。。。可能是因为我在初中时被那些坏同学欺负,让我看到,很多人的不好,甚至是在旁看的女生也不会帮忙,有的还一起弄。
但也因为这样,我开始把所有事情都靠自己做,坏事也只收在自己心里.

我一直坚持着只想把我心房打开给我的女朋友。。。所以我一直在等。
但我没想到妹妹会是那个帮助我的人。
现在我了解了,我真的很幸福能认识妹妹你。
你就像一个小天使一样,照顾着你身边和身名中对你很重要的人。我也要相同的照顾妹妹。。。永远。。。真的。

Tuesday, 5 April 2011

I will just let nature takes its course...I will just do things that are given to me, even though what I said isn't what I want sometimes... thinking about this, makes me feel angry about myself.
Anyway, death is an inevitable things for all human, regardless of how fortunate or how unfortunate one is. Its probably just the intensity thats different, and the life a person has went through.
But, the ending point is the same for all.
...(cry)...I can't control my tears...I will try not to recall these stuffs again...

Monday, 4 April 2011

陳曉東 - 比我幸福


...so sad...reminds me of the time when I love you...


妹妹,真的很想你。。。惨了。。XP
真怕如果我去当兵不是更想你。。。我真不喜欢分开太久的感觉。。。但这不是妹妹的错,是我的性格吧。。。

P.S. : 超爱我的新外套 ^_^

Sunday, 3 April 2011

SHOXX Vol. 219 : Versailles



Found out that there are people searching for Versailles's info on SHOXX Vol.219.
Hope posting these photos helped those who wants to see~
Yuya 's Official Site tab is added to my blog! Do visit the site when you are free~

Tsuguki 's Birthday

Happy Birthday Tsuguki! I love Dolly so much, I will always support the band's music!
Though, I hope you can sell your CDs at Singapore too xD
Anyway, hope you enjoy your birthday, cute-babyface & talented Tsuguki !

Friday, 1 April 2011

I'm actually quite confused sometimes... I don't know what I should expect from the future.
Honestly, I'm quite worried of my future, I'm worried that it would not turned out to be what I really want and deserves. I don't really know what I want sometimes, things get complicated, and I just wish things could be like how it is now. But actually, thats not what I really wanted either...
I think I lack the strength for me to face the change in life..